why yes, yes it is id almost think u were psychic if it wasnt for me just bein hella predictable aight so anyway if i uh wanted to put together a lil sumsum like a gift basket or whatever of yknow ""merch"" how much overtime would i theoretically have to work to cover dat shit?
i mean unless u know somebody named runaan ive literally never met him but i mean who doesnt like drugs
[There's a long pause before Steven's reply, as he has to first stop laughing hysterically.]
I mean, if you really *want* to, I'll just put you on merchandise preparation duty the next two months. It's enough of an involved process for the stuff inside the baggies that you'll be earning back the cost of the gloom juice from Hythlo--and you'll learn the valuable skill of cooking persim herb.
Runaan... actually, I think he might be one of our regulars. I think he's Thace's friend? Or, well, they're *friendly*. You could ask him what Runaan likes, so you can put in a little personalized touch to the present? Or I can ask him for you.
[How dare you laugh at her, she's 100% serious here!! Geez. Geez.
Chloe is enough of a lazy bum that the idea of working two months for some rando she's never met almost sounds unappealing, but merch prep has her barreling over that obstacle pretty fast.]
hells yea dude just consider me prepmaster chloe reporting for duty
idk what a thace is but if you could get me some info about this dude id appreciate it idw spoil the surprise by poking around, nah mean? adding a lil authenticity to it might be a good idea i mean if i personally just got a basket of drugs for chrimmy i wouldn't think twice but we gotta think of the average folk here i assume they would probs be like oh my god its a drug and then call the jennies
i feel like i said the d word too many times if i disappear its because the jennies foun
[He can laugh if he wants to. And may still be laughing now, because you keep saying things that crack him the fuck up.
So yeah, it'll be a few more minutes before he starts typing back, not the least because Steven has to ask Thace about Runaan.]
Merch prep isn't an everyday thing, thank God. We aren't selling out so fast as all that. It's a couple of hours a week right now--cooking the herb is a multi-day process--and it's mostly just tedious, to be honest. I'd listen to podcasts while I did it. But I think you may have noticed that our secret menu is all *hella expensive* compared to the public one. Sure, gloom juice is the worst, because we have to pay Hythlo and then mark it up to make a profit, but the other two are marked up because cooking persim herb is a *pain*.
But I *do* like you, so I will turn a blind eye if not all of the finished product makes it below the counter, as long as a reasonable amount is still there. That is to say, don't skim off more than 5-10% of any given batch? And come February we can talk about if you want to keep on doing merch prep while being paid for it.
As for Thace... Chloe. Mija. You know that seven-foot-tall guy who's always hanging around? The one with the great hair and the gold eyes, who doesn't cover up his hickeys? The one that keeps helping us open? *That's* Thace. I mean, I get it. You usually just hear me calling him 'bebe.' But he *does* have a name.
That said, I'm asking him about Runaan and he suggests something practical, like food for him and his pokemon or insulated blankets or a waterproof tarp. And also that whatever you send, you probably should add a note where you imply but don't actually state that you're not human.
According to Thace, and I quote, Runaan "has an at least partially justified suspicion of humans from his own world that's grown into an unjustified hatred of the whole species." Thace is working on it with him? But it's slow going. (He's okay with Thace, because Thace is a space alien back home.)
[If Steven is somewhere in Fight Club, she can probably hear him laughing from wherever he is- not that she would make the connection here, he's probably just looking at pokemon memes.]
oh just u wait bossdude, when i find that sweet sweet combo that blows the panties off every karen and chad that walks thru our doors we will be ROLLING in fat stacks of cash money
[there's a long, long pause as she processes all that and then immediately goes to text Thace offscreen.]
i totally knew that and thats all we gotta say on that ever again
so what youre saying is i can pretend to be something uber cool im gonna be a fucking dragon NO dragon GODDESS gracing him with divine kush from the firey heavens this holiday season
[He is, if not in actual Fight Club, at the apartment directly above, getting his mad cuddles on with the person that Chloe is now texting. So it goes.]
My God. Yes, sure, whatever you want. Just whatever it is, make sure it's something you can sustain long term? We don't want to break the poor elf's heart.
[Chloe can never know that they've shared a laugh over this, life would officially be over for at least 10 minutes.]
sure thing bossdude ill legally change my name to chloe the dragon goddess he can check my license and everything would a dragon goddess need a license? idk probably not
I mean, find someone to help you fake it during the weird weekend and you should be good.
(And don't feel bad about that little name mix-up there. Honestly, as I told Thace when he first noticed about the whole 'Bebe' thing a couple days ago, if I hadn't introduced myself to you properly, there's every chance in the world you'd be under the impression that I'm called 'Mai Hunter' by now.)
[What is gratitude? From an authority figure, no less? Can you eat it? This is foreign and she doesn't know what to do aside from scream inside and channel that strange new feeling of pride into viciously scrubbing the toilet with a tooth brush.
A tooth brush. who is she? What did you do to her? Is this payback for viciously reinserting hella into your vocabulary?]
[OOC: SO YOUR BII FUCKED UP A LITTLE and it turns out that Gloom Juice was never meant for resale at Fight Club, oops. Everything there is Handsome Jack's unused personal supply, bought directly from Hythlo, and currently for Fight Club employees to use or gift as they see fit. Steven would like to resell it for a large profit, but he can't right now.
LUCKILY this really only affects the first tag I replied to this with and this tag from Chloe's new job log, the second of which I've already edited to reflect the true reality of the situation.
SORRY ABOUT THIS BUT AT LEAST WE CAUGHT IT PRETTY EARLY???]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
fingersandteeth) wrote2022-02-21 05:11 pm
no subject
id almost think u were psychic if it wasnt for me just bein hella predictable
aight so anyway if i uh wanted to put together a lil sumsum
like a gift basket or whatever of yknow ""merch""
how much overtime would i theoretically have to work to cover dat shit?
i mean unless u know somebody named runaan
ive literally never met him but i mean who doesnt like drugs
no subject
I mean, if you really *want* to, I'll just put you on merchandise preparation duty the next two months. It's enough of an involved process for the stuff inside the baggies that you'll be earning back the cost of the gloom juice from Hythlo--and you'll learn the valuable skill of cooking persim herb.
Runaan... actually, I think he might be one of our regulars. I think he's Thace's friend? Or, well, they're *friendly*. You could ask him what Runaan likes, so you can put in a little personalized touch to the present? Or I can ask him for you.
no subject
Chloe is enough of a lazy bum that the idea of working two months for some rando she's never met almost sounds unappealing, but merch prep has her barreling over that obstacle pretty fast.]
hells yea dude just consider me prepmaster chloe reporting for duty
idk what a thace is but if you could get me some info about this dude id appreciate it
idw spoil the surprise by poking around, nah mean?
adding a lil authenticity to it might be a good idea
i mean if i personally just got a basket of drugs for chrimmy i wouldn't think twice but we gotta think of the average folk here
i assume they would probs be like oh my god its a drug and then call the jennies
i feel like i said the d word too many times
if i disappear its because the jennies foun
no subject
So yeah, it'll be a few more minutes before he starts typing back, not the least because Steven has to ask Thace about Runaan.]
Merch prep isn't an everyday thing, thank God. We aren't selling out so fast as all that. It's a couple of hours a week right now--cooking the herb is a multi-day process--and it's mostly just tedious, to be honest. I'd listen to podcasts while I did it. But I think you may have noticed that our secret menu is all *hella expensive* compared to the public one. Sure, gloom juice is the worst, because we have to pay Hythlo and then mark it up to make a profit, but the other two are marked up because cooking persim herb is a *pain*.
But I *do* like you, so I will turn a blind eye if not all of the finished product makes it below the counter, as long as a reasonable amount is still there. That is to say, don't skim off more than 5-10% of any given batch? And come February we can talk about if you want to keep on doing merch prep while being paid for it.
As for Thace... Chloe. Mija. You know that seven-foot-tall guy who's always hanging around? The one with the great hair and the gold eyes, who doesn't cover up his hickeys? The one that keeps helping us open? *That's* Thace. I mean, I get it. You usually just hear me calling him 'bebe.' But he *does* have a name.
That said, I'm asking him about Runaan and he suggests something practical, like food for him and his pokemon or insulated blankets or a waterproof tarp. And also that whatever you send, you probably should add a note where you imply but don't actually state that you're not human.
According to Thace, and I quote, Runaan "has an at least partially justified suspicion of humans from his own world that's grown into an unjustified hatred of the whole species." Thace is working on it with him? But it's slow going. (He's okay with Thace, because Thace is a space alien back home.)
no subject
oh just u wait bossdude, when i find that sweet sweet combo that blows the panties off every karen and chad that walks thru our doors we will be ROLLING in fat stacks of cash money
[there's a long, long pause as she processes all that and then immediately goes to text Thace offscreen.]
i totally knew that and thats all we gotta say on that ever again
so what youre saying is i can pretend to be something uber cool
im gonna be a fucking dragon
NO
dragon GODDESS gracing him with divine kush from the firey heavens this holiday season
no subject
My God. Yes, sure, whatever you want. Just whatever it is, make sure it's something you can sustain long term? We don't want to break the poor elf's heart.
no subject
sure thing bossdude
ill legally change my name to chloe the dragon goddess
he can check my license and everything
would a dragon goddess need a license? idk probably not
no subject
(And don't feel bad about that little name mix-up there. Honestly, as I told Thace when he first noticed about the whole 'Bebe' thing a couple days ago, if I hadn't introduced myself to you properly, there's every chance in the world you'd be under the impression that I'm called 'Mai Hunter' by now.)
no subject
i say this with all due respect boss, from the bottom of my heart
fuck off and go cuddle with your dudemeat and let me die under the bar
no subject
(I'll be nice and not count the time dead as part of your break.)
no subject
gotta look busy!!!
no subject
(We'll put your gift set together later, once we've got our hands on some tissue paper and a nice box.)
no subject
thx bossmeister
ill pick out someg firey wrap to rly sell my dragonsona
oooo charizard themed wrapping paper fuck yes
okokok for realsies im gonna go actually be a decent employee and check the bathrooms
i will definitely need that luck for this
no subject
(And thanks, Chloe. For everything you do.)
no subject
A tooth brush. who is she? What did you do to her? Is this payback for viciously reinserting hella into your vocabulary?]
no subject
(Also holy shit, get a real bowl brush, please. Using a toothbrush is going to take forever.)]
RETCON TIME RETCON TIME
LUCKILY this really only affects the first tag I replied to this with and this tag from Chloe's new job log, the second of which I've already edited to reflect the true reality of the situation.
SORRY ABOUT THIS BUT AT LEAST WE CAUGHT IT PRETTY EARLY???]