I know, I know. Believe me, *I know*. Do you think I set out to fall in love with Jack? Fuck no! He was supposed to be a regular fuckbuddy, that's all. No emotions beyond casual friendship needed or required.
You remember how I fucking adore listening to you talk about how you tortured people for funsies? We are not playing Who's The Biggest Psychopath right now, Lydia. Fuck knows my own boyfriend was going to wipe out an entire planet's worth of people just because he owned it and he didn't like the original settlers.
... oh shit. You're worried on how Tyler's going to take it when he finds out about that. Aren't you.
I mean, you did with me, but I suspect that was a matter of us both recognizing each other for what we *are* and Tyler's got a better Normal Person face than even mine. Probably because he used to *be* normal and I never was, so what I can fake through observation, he can emulate *much better* through experience.
Anyway.
You did it because you needed the suffering to keep you *unalive*, right? Just tell him *that*. He's a big boy. He understands doing morally dubious shit to survive.
It's not like he's a shining bastion of virtue, just because he was made like us instead of born like us. This is Tyler "Casual Hypnotism" Huang we're talking about.
I'm pretty good at picking out fucked up people, so that's the reasoning I'm using for saying anything to you. Years of practice, mirrors, etcetc.
I could have used another emotion, I told you this. Suffering just worked the best of the options. It painted a target on my back instead, you know. Everything just escalates to a point where you need more and have to take it into your own hands.
There's a difference between casual fucking hypnotism and actively torturing people, Steven. Good god. Just because there's a supposed reasoning for it doesn't mean people care what that reasoning is.
I know there's a difference, Lydia. I was just trying to use an example that *he* doesn't bother to hide, because I don't want to bring his wrath down on my head for telling you shit he doesn't want people to know.
Look. Here's the thing. Everything you did you chose to do. That's true. But at least you just did it to strangers. The morally dubious shit *we* had to do to survive was to the other people we were stuck there with.
Tyler will get you did what you had to do. I promise you. He will. I can't tell you anything more than that. But he *will*.
It was people I didn't know because I wasn't stuck anywhere with anyone and like hell if I was going to torture my own brother. Not that it would have worked, but the point still stands.
Honestly, the better bet might be to just shove it all back down and forget it happened. If he doesn't know then it doesn't really matter, does it? I've been acting for my entire life and unlife, it's really nothing new.
So have I. And I can tell you for a goddamn fact that if you go into something like this pretending to be someone you're not, *it will fuck everything up a thousand times worse than if you were just honest about yourself*.
This is why people like us *date each other* and not normal people. Because we can be ourselves around each other. Tyler's not *exactly* like us but in a lot of ways he's pretty damn close. He's close enough that it counts.
Look. I know you're having trouble believing me. But you'll be happier both in the long and the short run if you tell him. And I think he'll surprise you.
I pretty sure he's more open to a real relationship than you think.
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fingersandteeth) wrote2022-02-21 05:11 pm
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Kinda like you and Tyler.
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You remember the whole being an awful person who tortured people for funsies thing? Yeah, that.
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... oh shit. You're worried on how Tyler's going to take it when he finds out about that. Aren't you.
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You don't just casually go "oh, yes, I tortured people", after all.
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Anyway.
You did it because you needed the suffering to keep you *unalive*, right? Just tell him *that*. He's a big boy. He understands doing morally dubious shit to survive.
It's not like he's a shining bastion of virtue, just because he was made like us instead of born like us. This is Tyler "Casual Hypnotism" Huang we're talking about.
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I could have used another emotion, I told you this. Suffering just worked the best of the options. It painted a target on my back instead, you know. Everything just escalates to a point where you need more and have to take it into your own hands.
There's a difference between casual fucking hypnotism and actively torturing people, Steven. Good god. Just because there's a supposed reasoning for it doesn't mean people care what that reasoning is.
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Look. Here's the thing. Everything you did you chose to do. That's true. But at least you just did it to strangers. The morally dubious shit *we* had to do to survive was to the other people we were stuck there with.
Tyler will get you did what you had to do. I promise you. He will. I can't tell you anything more than that. But he *will*.
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Honestly, the better bet might be to just shove it all back down and forget it happened. If he doesn't know then it doesn't really matter, does it? I've been acting for my entire life and unlife, it's really nothing new.
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This is why people like us *date each other* and not normal people. Because we can be ourselves around each other. Tyler's not *exactly* like us but in a lot of ways he's pretty damn close. He's close enough that it counts.
Look. I know you're having trouble believing me. But you'll be happier both in the long and the short run if you tell him. And I think he'll surprise you.
I pretty sure he's more open to a real relationship than you think.
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[That's it, that's the reply. For all those words, that's all she has to say for once.]
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But suit yourself.
[He's going to find Isis and bitch to her about this. Yes, he's complaining to a psychic bird. No, he doesn't care.]